Some manners, please.

My best friend, Abbi, is in the National Guard and is leaving today to go to Iraq for about a year. Her husband is already over there, and between the two of them, they have 5 children. Needless to say, this is very hard on them. However, I think Abbi is looking forward to going, if only to get her tour over with. I called Abbi a few times last night to talk to her. Here is one of our conversations after my cell phone did something strange:

Angela: Hello, Hello?

Voice on the other end: Hey

Angela: What are you doing? You sound strange…..Who is this…..Abbi?

Voice: Who do you think this is? Did you have a brain fart or something?

(I am a little worried, because it sounds like Abbi has smoked 50 million cigarettes and has been crying for the past 10 days. So like any friend, I gently prod her.)

Angela: What in the hell is wrong with you? You sound like a drag queen!

Voice: I do not, I sound like a man. I always sound like a man.

(I am more confused than ever, but it does kind of sound like Abbi, and I hear an echo, so I think maybe she sounds funny because of our connection. I decide to keep talking, even though I keep thinking to myself, “did I dial the wrong number.”)

Angela: So how are things going?

Voice: Okay. We ship out tomorrow, so I won’t be able to call you anymore.

(Now I am thinking, “Alright, this is definitely Abbi. Who else could possibly be shipping out tomorrow?")

Angela: Seriously, you sound like a freaking drag queen. What’s wrong with you? Are you okay?

(By this time, I am seriously irritated, mainly because Abbi is being kind of weird, but also because I know that she is upset and isn't talking to me about it.)

Voice: I have been crying. I cried earlier when I talked to my mom. Maybe that is why I sound weird.

Angela: Why in the world did you talk to your mom? Was she nice to you?

Voice: My mom is always nice.

Angela: No she’s not. She is never nice to you. (Abbi and her mother have a less than perfect relationship and while this might sound like a very unkind thing to say, we are best friends and talk to each other this way all of the time. What’s a best friend, if not someone you can be totally honest with?)

Voice: Who is this?

Angela: Angela

Voice: Angela, who?

Angela: Angela Williams. I think I am talking to the wrong person.

Voice: Yeah, me too.

This whole conversation lasted about 3 or 4 minutes, proving yet again, that I am completely goofy.

I love you Abbi. Please be safe and try not to get shot!